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How children thrive : the practical science of raising independent, resilient, and happy kids
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<p> Discover the proven ways parents can help their children learn, overcome adversity, get along with others, and become independent--while you relax and enjoy being a parent </p> <p>How do children thrive? As a parent, you probably think about this all the time. You want your children to have happy, healthy, and meaningful lives--but what's the best way to support them? In How Children Thrive, developmental pediatrician and parent Dr. Mark Bertin provides a positive, simple, and empowering approach for raising children of all ages. Bringing together mindfulness, new science on brain development, and the messy reality of being a parent, Dr. Bertin has a created a breakthrough guide that will help children--and their parents--flourish.<br> Research has shown that the key to raising resilient, kind, and independent children lies in executive function , our mental capacity to manage just about everything in life. "Despite its wonky, overly scientific name, there is nothing complicated about building executive function," Dr. Bertin writes. "It's actually a lot more straightforward and less anxiety-provoking than most of the parenting advice out there." Through concise, easily applied chapters, Dr. Bertin provides simple strategies for helping your children develop healthy EF while taking care of yourself and enjoying your family. Highlights include:</p> <p>Mindfulness--how it directly builds EF and how to incorporate mindful practices for the whole family<br> * The importance of free play, the science behind it, and how to encourage more of it<br> * Technology--how much is too much? At what age is screen time OK? Help your kids have a healthy relationship with media.<br> * Create simple routines that support independence around homework, nutrition, sleep, friendships, and more<br> * Age-appropriate advice for toddlers, teens, and even your twenty-somethings<br> * Limits and discipline: How to determine--and stick with--consequences for unwanted behavior<br> * Understand markers for whether your child is developmentally on track or if extra support might be needed<br> * Find the advice you need when you need it with short, independent chapters full of concrete practices<br> * Bring more calm, ease, and joy to your parenting while taking care of yourself--even when family life gets chaotic<br> * Give yourself permission to make mistakes and adapt along the way<br> "The pressure to be the perfect parent is overwhelming," writes Dr. Bertin, "but the truth is the job is too challenging and varied to ever be done to perfection." With compassion and reassurance, Dr. Bertin presents a relaxed, instinctual, and evidence-based approach to raising children who thrive.</p>
Table of Contents
Forewordp. xi
Introductionp. xiii
Part 1Brain Management as a Developmental Pathp. 1
Marshmallows and the Developing Mindp. 2
Managing Your Child's Brain-Until They Can Manage It Themselvesp. 5
Putting One Foot in Front of the Other: Monitoring Milestonesp. 10
Kids Just Need to Be Kidsp. 16
Executive Function Every Dayp. 21
Not Ready for Prime Time Preschoolp. 26
School-Age EF: Building Independence Through Routinep. 30
Keeping Homework in Its Placep. 34
Adolescent Brains Aren't Grown-Up Brains: Collaborating with Your Teenp. 39
You Gotta Take Care of Yourselfp. 43
Part 2The A-E-I-O-U and Y of Childhood Well-Beingp. 49
Prioritizing What Matters Mostp. 51
The Vital Role of Playp. 55
Putting Your Kids on a Media Dietp. 59
Positive Parenting with Authorityp. 65
Limit-Setting Guides Children Toward Successp. 70
Chronic Stress and Communicationp. 76
Training Your Brain to Live More Intentionallyp. 81
Practice: Breathing Meditationp. 83
Bringing Mindfulness Homep. 84
Mindfulness Starts with Youp. 88
EF Starts with Consistency, Consistency, Consistencyp. 93
Books, the Brain, and Family Relationshipsp. 97
Building a Better Learnerp. 101
Making the Choice for Interventionp. 105
Nothing More or Less Than an EF Deficiencyp. 108
Facts Are Facts, Even Around Child Developmentp. 111
Grit, Mindset, and Their Relationship to EFp. 117
Motivation in Kids Relies on Successp. 120
Persistence + Skill = Resiliencep. 123
Part 3Practical, Positive Parenting: Self-Management Every Dayp. 127
Behavior and the Brain: The Early Years (I Want It Now)p. 128
Time-Outs in Real Timep. 134
Behavior and the Brain: The Teen Years (Leave Me Alone ... Except When I Need You)p. 137
Lovable and Healthy Nutrition for Childrenp. 142
To Sleep, Perchance to Sleepp. 147
Modeling Media Use: Parents Firstp. 152
Managing Media Through the Agesp. 156
Part 4Mindfulness and Familiesp. 159
The Antidote for Perfectionismp. 160
Practice: Working with Your Inner Criticp. 163
Attention, the Negativity Bias, and Stressp. 164
Feeding the Right Wolfp. 168
Eating as a Metaphor for Mindfulnessp. 171
Practice: Eating Mindfullyp. 173
Managing Stress from Our Toes to Our Headp. 174
Practice: Body Scan Meditationp. 176
Emotional Rescue: Using Mindfulness to Reset Your Internal Lifep. 177
Practice: Paying Attention to Emotionsp. 179
Awareness of Thought: Finding the Light in Mental Stormsp. 181
Practice: Watching the Weatherp. 184
Shoring Up Resilience Through Mindfulness: Its All in Your Mindp. 186
Unhooked from Reactivity, Hooked onto Wisdomp. 190
Practice: Getting Unhookedp. 193
See a Habit to Break a Habitp. 194
Practice: Fifteen Breathsp. 197
Self-Compassion and the Average Parentp. 198
Practice: Self-Compassionp. 201
Common-Sense Compassionp. 202
Practice: Compassion (Lovingkindness) Meditationp. 204
Everyday Mindfulnessp. 205
Mindful Kids in Contextp. 209
Closing Thoughts: Seeing the World as It Isp. 211
Acknowledgmentsp. 215
Notesp. 217
About the Authorp. 229
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