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Raising a secure child : how circle of security parenting can help you nurture your child's attachment, emotional resilience, and freedom to explore
2017
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  Library Journal Review

Attachments build confidence that enable children to find who they truly are and can become in the wide world, according to Hoffman, Glen Cooper, and Bert Powell's tome on nurturing emotional resilience and exploration. Twenty years ago, the authors created a 20-week program for parents struggling with their relationship with toddlers and preschoolers, which has been adapted in schools and therapeutic settings. Children with a secure attachment with at least one parent do better in school, have stronger friendships, enjoy better physical health, and go on to have more intimate, fulfilling, and enduring relationships, according to studies the authors cite from the 1950s. Hoffman et al. also believe one of the seminal mistakes of parenting is in placing focus on trying not to make mistakes. Instead of perfect parenting, the authors stress the need for present parenting. They believe being there for our children, mistakes and all, builds trust and frees our children to be who they really are in front of us. Security leads to confidence, which leads to self-reliance. Although the book is marketed to the average parent, its suggested audience seems to be professionals in the psychology or childhood development fields as the writing style is a bit more slow-paced and the authors make liberal use of charts and diagrams. VERDICT A parent with little to no reading time might prefer a format that gives simple suggestions rather than case studies and quotes from experts. Recommended for those already familiar with the Circle of Security method or for professionals.-Julia M. Reffner, North -Chesterfield, VA © Copyright 2016. Library Journals LLC, a wholly owned subsidiary of Media Source, Inc. No redistribution permitted.

  Publishers Weekly Review

Psychotherapists Hoffman, Cooper, and Powell, who have shared a clinical practice since 1985, provide a clearly drawn map to the circle of security, their attachment theory-based program for attuning parents to child needs. Defining attachment as children relying on caregivers for physical and emotional nourishment, the authors cite research showing how secure attachment prepares children to have better health, relationships, and performance in school. They emphasize that the program is applicable to parents of various cultural and socioeconomic backgrounds, and say it will help them cope with all kinds of life obstacles. Rather than promising "perfect" child-parent relationships, the coauthors aim to create relationships in which the children understand that parents also make mistakes. Part one of the guide explains the circle of security's rationale and initial establishment; part two details building and maintaining it throughout childhood. Embedded in each chapter are illustrative anecdotes and analyses of various examples of behavior to help parents in different situations. This is a highly usable guide with the potential to enrich relationships of all kinds. (Feb.) © Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved.
Summary
Today's parents are constantly pressured to be perfect. But in striving to do everything right, we risk missing what children really need for lifelong emotional security. Now the simple, powerful "Circle of Security" parenting strategies that Kent Hoffman, Glen Cooper, and Bert Powell have taught thousands of families are available in self-help form for the first time. <br> <br> You will learn: <br> *How to balance nurturing and protectiveness with promoting your child's independence. <br> *What emotional needs a toddler or older child may be expressing through difficult behavior.<br> *How your own upbringing affects your parenting style--and what you can do about it. <br> <br> Filled with vivid stories and unique practical tools, this book puts the keys to healthy attachment within everyone's reach--self-understanding, flexibility, and the willingness to make and learn from mistakes. Self-assessment checklists can be downloaded and printed for ease of use.
Table of Contents
Forewordp. ix
Acknowledgmentsp. xii
Authors' Notep. xv
Introductionp. 1
Part IAll Around the Circle: Understanding Attachment and the Importance of Security
1Attachment: Why It Mattersp. 11
2Security: Befriending Imperfectionp. 35
3A Map for Attachment: The Circle of Securityp. 58
4Being the Hands on the Circlep. 83
5Shark Music: How Our Childhood Echoes in Our Parentingp. 115
6Behavior as Communication: Cues and Miscuesp. 146
Part IICreating and Maintaining the Circle: How to Be Bigger, Stronger, Wiser, and Kind-and Good Enough
7Shark Bones: Exploring Our Core Sensitivitiesp. 181
8Testing New Waters: Choosing Securityp. 210
9Staying Afloat: Choosing Security Over and Over as Your Child Crowsp. 239
Resourcesp. 265
Indexp. 270
About the Authorsp. 279
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